Hello and welcome to a very very special post that I’m pleased to have penned myself!
Yes, I’m going to reveal to you the title of my very first work. You must know it best as #FatGirlsInLove which I started tweeting about very early June and which made me whine a lot!
#FatGirlsInLove is written from the point of view of an anxious pansexual fat cis girl who also happens to be a makeup artist. June loves makeup and her cats. But recently, there’s been a third item on the list of things she’d love to think about a lot. Yep, you guessed it. It’s Selena Clarke. Nosy, charming and full of soft rolls. Selena is a cis demisexual fat black girl who’s proud to represent for others. She doles kindness but is extremely wise about life.
They sound amazing, don’t they? Check out the hashtag on Twitter for aesthetics and memes!
Well, today, I have a very pretty thing ready for you: the title! The title is something a reader of mine suggested and it just made so much sense to me. Also, I asked a dear friend of mine to write it down in their handwriting. You can say that this has been teamwork since the start.
But first, a sneak peek!
As you can guess, I am chatty but my MC, June Bana? Is not. Enough of me, though, here’s June and Selena being cute over cupcakes.
“How long have you known Joey?”
“We graduated the same class. She basically saw me crying in the bathroom one day my second year of college and we became friends,” Selena professed. She was in the process of decorating tiny cupcakes.
“Wow, that long?”
“Yep, it’s been close to eight years.” She looked up from scrutinizing the last tiny cupcake in her current batch. It was a beautiful peachy color. She’d made so many of the small things, June had lost count. She sipped her Sprite. A thin layer of shine on one corner of Selena’s forehead made her fingers tingle to lean over to blot it.
“It’s cool that you got to meet a best friend in college. First year, I was struggling to balance shit out. What with me being anxious and my father passing away,” she blurted. Automatically, she wanted to take back the oversharing.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Selena murmured. She paused her decorating, but June automatically shrugged.
“I was diagnosed three months after my father passed away. I got on meds and it was a journey but I’m as balanced as I could be,” she murmured. She sounded so self-deprecating. God.
Selena nodded at that and June was relieved that she didn’t ask about her father. It’d been eight years since Baba passed away but no matter how many times June mentioned it, it never got easier to talk about it. In those first two years, she’d used to crack one joke after the other. Using humor as a shield had been her go-to solution to ignore her emotions for a long time.
June recalled how she stood in front of her mirror and made lots of promises to be anything but herself, she decided: fuck it. She was going to roleplay as a more courageous version of herself.
“It helps that I have two roommates who masquerade as alarm clocks and keep me accountable. Who basically lick my lashes to get me out of bed.” She tried to lighten up the mood although Selena hadn’t looked very uncomfortable. She was quite focused on her cupcakes, adorably so.
“Your cats, right? Lemon and Mint, yeah?” Selena worked methodologically. June could see how steady her hands were. How she held her breath for a couple of seconds as she perfected every dollop of cream on the cupcakes.
“Yeah! Lemon and Mint. My kids.” As if on autopilot, June whipped out her phone from her purse.
She realized then that she hadn’t touched for the past fifteen minutes she’d been at Selena’s. That must have been some sort of millennial achievement, right?
She brought up pictures of her cats. June knew Selena had probably seen one or two of the thousands of pictures she posted of the dynamic feline duo, but June had two topics she loved talking about the most: her cats and makeup.
“Lemon is older and grumpy but so, so, so loving. He—he’s usually the one waking me up. Mint is around a year now and I got him the beginning the year when I needed a heavier weight to keep me grounded.”
She hadn’t told anyone that. People knew generally that Lemon was older due to how long she’d posted his pictures but not about Mint. Not about the reason of why she adopted him the minute a friend of a friend from school had posted about her cat giving birth to a litter of mixed breed kittens.
Selena paused her cupcake-decorating, washed her hands quickly and leaned over the counter, which brought her gorgeousness so much closer, making June stutter one or three hundred times. Thankfully, Selena was intent on the phone and drying her hands. She probably didn’t see the thirteen shades of enchanted June had turned into.
Selena busily cooed and hummed at June’s words. She reached with a clean hand and asked with her eyes, “Is it okay if I swipe?”
June nodded. Her camera roll was full of cat pics, reaction pics, makeup looks she’d done at her part-time, and looks she’d done on herself.
Selena’s eyes brightened with every swipe and June didn’t feel the usual dread of people reacting to the innerworkings of her chaotic brain. She stopped at a picture that June snagged when Lemon had perched on her chest and Mint was sniffing her cheek.
“You look so adorable,” Selena admired.
“Maybe a family can be one Arab-Persian bum and her two cats.”
“Bum, pfft,” Selena huffed jokingly, and June shrugged. She was self-deprecating. It was part of the package.
Well! That was my June. Always fighting herself in her mind but she tries so hard!
And that was also my queen Selena. Who is curious. Enchanting. And a baker. She’s basically my dream girl. Don’t tell anyone I told you that.
What y’all have come here to see: The Title!
So? What do you think of it? Soft on soft… on soft on soft. The title just demands to be said again and again, doesn’t it? Here’s to all my softies out there, whether it’s a soft heart or a soft body. You are loved, okay?
If you like this title and wanna share, feel free to mention me on Twitter @Merriamreads and tell your friends to look forward to this soft book.
Juice Drinking Game: take a sip every time you read the word soft!
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